Asterios Kills a Kid | The kids advice podcast hosted by broken people

Notice: Asterios Kills a Kid Has Moved

March 31, 2019

A stylised painting of Sriracha and Asterios shouting into a microphone. The title reads, 'The Loudest Podcast'

The Loudest Podcast is where you will find all AKAK content from here on out.


Producer Jesse here! I’ll get right to answering all of your questions:

“Asterios ended the show?”

— You

Yep. Porg chatter too! Turns out the only thing that Asterios ACTUALLY kills is podcasts.

Oh shit, no, it turns out AKAK is still alive and well as a segment of Asterios and Sriracha’s new show, The Loudest Podcast.

“Segment? So basically a neutered version of the original show?”

— You

Yes! That’s absolutely right and it WILL NOT STAND.

Hold on, it turns out there’s this full-length episode up called Asterios Kills A Kid Presents, “Hard Up For Heroin!”

It’s… actually pretty good.

“Are you sure? I really wanted to be angry about this.”

— You

Yeah, what the fuck Asterios! You can’t just end a podcast without stirring up a shit storm of drama. There are precedents.

At the very least you and Sriracha could have separated and started competing podcasts. But instead you’re sober and better than ever?!

“UNACCEPTABLE! Where do I send my hate mail?”

— You

The question submission page doubles as a hate mail line. I will forward all hate mail directly to Asterios. If we get any kids questions I’ll send those too.

You can also continue leaving voicemails at (347) 705-7617.


On a personal note, it’s been a blast working on this show. AKAK is a favourite for a lot of you, and I want to thank everyone for your questions and time.

I’ll still be involved behind the scenes, just less visibly. I read all of the questions submitted through the site, so if you want me to kill myself, you know where to let me know!

<3
Jesse